DR RADICA MAHASE
Agatha Christie, English writer said, "A mother's love for her child is like nothing else in the world. It knows no law, no pity, it dates all things and crushes down remorselessly all that stands in its path.” This week, in celebration of Mother’s Day, I am sharing an article written by Senator Jayanti Lutchmedial, the proud mother of a beautiful little girl, who was diagnosed with autism.
“My name is Jayanti Lutchmedial. I’m an attorney and, for the last two-and-a-half years I’ve been an Opposition Senator. My daughter Zivah, is 6 years old. When she was around 2 and a half years old, I realised that she was showing some signs of being on the spectrum. My first clue was her delayed speech. When I started doing research, I realised that what I thought was just clumsiness could be difficulty with regulating her body movements and poor proprioception which was also a symptom of autism spectrum disorder, so I decided to take her to a paediatrician to have her assessed.
At first, being told that she was on the spectrum, felt like 1,000 daggers to my heart. I come from a family with a strong emphasis on academics, and I felt like it was expected that she would be the same and follow in my footsteps. I instantly thought that she would not be normal and would never be treated as normal. My entire world felt hopeless and bleak. I went through all the stages typically associated with grief: denial, anger, depression etc.
For some time, I went through the motions of life and internalised a lot of negative feelings. It was only after hearing a sermon in church about the women in the Bible who were chosen by God, that I started getting it together and doing what I needed to do. I reached the stage of acceptance, but not just accepting that things were different, but rather accepting my role as the one chosen by God to be her mother and give her the best life possible.
[caption id="attachment_1016167" align="alignnone" width="750"] "I accept my role as the one chosen by God to be her mother." - Courtesy Kierron Yip Ngow Photography[/caption]
I started taking my daughter to different types of therapy and made a lot of changes in my life to make things work for us. I still struggle at times, emotionally, because there are a lot of sacrifices and I feel hampered at times, particularly in pursuit of my career goals. But those feelings quickly dissipate when I see the way she responds to me. Our relationship is unique and precious.
She is now in her first year of physical school. She previously did one year of online school. I am very fortunate that there is a private school very near to where we live, that accepted her, and she really loves school. One thing that I learnt early on is to celebrate her strengths and work to develop them. She is a good reader and recently she has shown an interest in cricket. She also loves music and is learning theory as well as piano, pan and dholak.
We still have many challenges, like sensitivity to noise and food textures, but we work through them together with
